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For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has coached tens of thousands of people from over 87 countries to achieve happiness and success in their dating and love lives.
Once a nerdy, skinny professor of philosophical psychology who couldn’t hold a conversation to save his life, David is now director of Aura Transformation Corp., and a world renowned dating and life coach using therapeutic methods.
Dr. Tian has been featured in international media, including AXN, Cosmopolitan, Psychology Today, as well as co-hosting a radio show on national radio and a weekly dating advice column in a national newspaper in Singapore.
The show, “Man Up: Masculinity for the Intelligent Man ( ” is David’s way of helping as many people as possible enjoy empowering and fulfilling lives, while contributing to the global understanding of masculinity in modern times. In the show, he takes your questions posed in the Man Up private Facebook group ( and answers based on his experience coaching ( tens of thousands of students around the world for over a decade.”
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In this episode, I talk about how to handle the question: “How many women have you slept with?”
Masculinity for the Intelligent Man. I am David Tian, Ph.D., and this is: Man Up.
Okay, welcome to episode 10. Episode 10 – big milestone. All right, here we go. It’s a question from Michael, it’s in two emails. I’m going to read it out: First of all, hey, love what you’re doing with Man Up. So, hey, good props man. Here’s the question: How do you set up dating multiple women i.e. a dating lifestyle where you’re looking for your 10 without coming across to women like a player or a douche bag. So, how do you set up dating multiple women without looking like a player? How does that conversation go? There’s more info on this, which is important. I’m dating educated, enlightened women and it always comes up you’re dating several people at once. I’m not physical with them all, but with some, yes. My dating objective is to get to know great women, searching for my partner-in-crime versus just dating to get laid. Ultimately, my strategy isn’t about notches on my belt but about dating women. Getting to know them very well and screening to find my 10. I don’t want to date one by one. If I wasn’t physical with anyone, it would be less of an issue. However, being physical is a huge part of connecting for me and being a good match. Thanks and I ask for a little bit more clarification, comes back with, how does a “real man” handle the sexual history question with women? I’m talking real educated, sophisticated women not club chicks. It strikes that me that these women want to know on some level that you’re not a douche bag/womanizer/just going to use them for sex. How many women have you slept with? Do you typically sleep with women on the first date? – That sort of question. And here’s the doozy: how do you be vague with integrity?
All right, Excellent, Michael. So that last question – it was really good that we get to the end of that. How do you be vague with integrity? In Aura Dating Academy there are – or Aura Transformation now – there are three guiding values. Relatively speaking, I don’t talk a lot about what your values ought to be.